this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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