That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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