I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I think your dad took our porno
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
