so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
