i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
