youre lurking in front of me
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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