she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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