his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
