Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He better not be in your backpack
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
