im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
