Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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