After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
