Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
