yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
420 ftw
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
