Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
