Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize