I'm really into asian looking animals
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
