dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
no more duck duck goose at the bar
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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