Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The beer is more important than you right now.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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