good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I don't deserve a penis
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
