talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize