I hope mine doesn't look like that
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
