You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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