Define "chronic" masturbator.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
