this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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