I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
