i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Dicks are not precious.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
