We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
