Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
my sisters under your porch take her home
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
