Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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