We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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