Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
