I think i peed on brittanys purse
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize