Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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