it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
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