the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
