He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Naked Twister starts at high noon
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize