We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
