if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
my poor anus
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Who put my cat in the fridge?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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