hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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