Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
