ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
