He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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