I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize