his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
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You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
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I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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