Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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