I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Enjoy the penises
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
