Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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