sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
