I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
